Specter of a Rose

Dedicated to Vaclav Nijinsky

He came in dancing,

no matter whence –

as if he’d fallen from the sky, a ray of light.

He seemed to ignore the ground,

each step a jump

to a silent music of sincere youthfulness.

He never laughed:

for him, it was

far more difficult to joke than to be earnest.

He said what was necessary

without insisting on anything,

his voice like the song of a rare bird.

I am the specter of a rose, the shadow of a summer,

who would not cry for such a thing, will never cry.

I live when the sun is rising and when it is sinking,

I am the spirit of a dream for those

who never dream.

The air around him

was trembling,

a springtime breeze moved by the wing of a butterfly.

He danced

as if in trance

in an invisible realm of motion.

No one was aware of his slow drifting

away from us (content and thoughtless),

his timid smile a desperate try

to keep himself from losing his footing –

We don’t know where he is now,

empty-eyed and pale-faced,

but that doesn’t matter, for I’m sure:

somewhere he’s dancing still.

He was the specter of a rose, the shadow of a summer,

who would not cry for such a thing, will never cry.

He lived from sunrise until sunset

as the spirit of a dream for those

who never dream.

I was the specter of a rose, the shadow of a summer,

who would not cry for such a thing, will never cry.

I lived from sunrise until sunset

as the spirit of a dream for those

who never dream.

Crystal 19.09.2003.

„Spectre de la rose“ was the name of one of the ballets made famous by the „God of dance“ Vaclav Nijinsky in early 20th century Paris. A few years later he developed schizophrenia. The last 30 years of his life he spent as a mentally deranged invalid.

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